Labels:for canned goods only
A stocky bald man in his forties with a beard and a tiny golden cross dangling from his left ear. A twentysomething guy with shoulder length hair tied in a ponytail wearing a black polo, black cargo pants and sandals. Both walk with an attitude. Actually, if you see them on the street, you would think they're rowdy rock-and-rollers or weird post-modern artists filled with I-hate-the-world angst or just plain misfits of the society.
They’re not.
I encountered them while attending a two-day conference on doing theology in the Philippines. Both were presenters of their papers, one a candidate for a master’s, the other for a doctorate. Judging from what I heard them say, both love people. And God. Sure, they do not fit the mold of how proper Christian men in a seminary should look like. They were not wearing the seminarian’s uniform: crisp polo (preferably long sleeves, no bold colors please); short to medium length hair neatly parted in the middle; loosely-fitted khaki, black or gray pants; buffed and kiwi-shiny leather shoes. There was even no trace of the required pious smile plastered on the face as if saying, “I have just been with Jesus.”
Looks, I’ve learned, can be deceiving.
For a time, the way I saw things was being filtered by my see-the-world-according-to-its-standards-colored shades. For instance, I sometimes judged people by what they wore (Oh, she’s wearing such huge hoop earrings. Aren’t those too big for Christian women to be wearing? Hmm...Maybe she’s a backslider!) Worse, my faulty shades has even made me assign greater value to people who look better or dress better or has a more "stable" personality. Unconsciously, I was plastering labels on people.
But God loves me so much that He doesn’t let me stay as I am. He reminded me of what He once said to a prophet: “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” God asked me to take off my shades and see people differently. When I did, I realized how myopic I have been. The eccentric woman with an equally-eccentric wardrobe actually has a heart of gold. The seemingly happy-go-lucky guy is actually melancholic and deep.With the revelation, I wondered, "How many treasures have I missed simply because I did not see them glittering?" Lord, how many people have I still yet to see, really see?
Labels are great for cans of corned beef and fruit cocktails. But not for people.
25 comments:
Nice one, beng! There's only one label that deserves to be stamped on every person: "Created in God's Image. Loved by God"
"Some are loved because they are worthy. Some are worthy because they are loved." --St. Augustine (or was it someone else?)
Thanks, Aleks. Yes, you're right about the only label that deserves to be stamped on every person. :-)
On the quote by St. Augustine (or whoever), aren't you glad that we are loved by God not because we are good, but because He is good? The God of the universe thinks we are worth it. Galing.
sabi nga love is a choice. I'm glad God choose to love us. :)
at hindi po ako backslider ate pramis. hahahaha *tambling*
bijoiski
After reading this article, I guess you can call me a "factory worker". I have placed a lot of labels on people as they pass the conveyor of life. Maybe because they also put a label on me. It's hard to remove, the adhesive is strong. I have been trying to take it out but I guess it will take a long time, probably a lifetime to remove it.
The thing about labels is it makes it easier to relate to other people. I think not all labels are wrong, but what is important is where we base it from...(someone edit me please, hehe, I'll just put this in or else it will take me forever). The problem with labeling at the start is we usually end up with the wrong labels...but if we've gotten to know the person better, we'll find a label that will surely fit...maybe even labels. What struck me is the part where we take off our shades and really look. And I like the last line, Beng. :)
So this is what you were pertaining to as your "unlabelling lesson." =) I remember a quote from one of my favorite books...
"It is only with the heart that one can rightly see. What is essential is invisible to the eye." -- The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Hi Ruben, thanks for dropping by. It's great that see you every now and then. :-) Good thought about labels too, Ben. This is what I enjoy about blogging--interacting with friends like you. I'm glad that I've gotten to know you as you went beyond being the quiet guy to being this quiet-guy-who-loves-God-and-became-my-friend!:-)
Nechie, I love "The Little Prince" too. With an unforgettable story about friendship, who wouldn't?:-)
this tendency to label people must be one of the hardest "skills" to unlearn.
Yes, Olive, one of the hardest. But writing about it helps. Before, I was unconsciously labeling people. Now, I have to consciously "not label" them. It's a good exercise though on extending extra grace to some people--in the same way that I sometimes need this "extra grace" from them.
Chris, I understand. A lifetime to remove it? That seems like a long time. How about "to take off the adhesive, it will take one pull, one day at a time"? Then it wouldn't seem so long. :-) Hang in there.
emo, one of the guys you were referring to (if i guessed right), used to be a colleague in davao, and has taught me a lot about being true to oneself, and to be authentic. that can lead to trouble, and in fact, we did get into trouble hehehe
ptr. bong,
wow. there really is such a thing as you can't be too you.
Pstr. Bong,
I'm embarrased that you knew who I was referring to. But Pstr. Emo really is such a character that I couldn't help but refer to him. Hmmm...I'm wondering what you did that got you in trouble. Is it like "2 pastors spend time in detention office"? haha.
Hey Olive, I've trying to decipher what you meant by what you said to Ptr. Bong
non-conformity can sometimes be a crime, sadly, among the evangelical circle. we got into trouble when we did not do what was the norm. we dared to try doing something never done before, and for that we were misunderstood, ridiculed and suspected to have "no doctrine" at all. complicated huh? suffice to say, we have more to learn about the grace to accept, the grace to not control, and the grace to let others be. End of sermon :-)
beng,
there ya go, he explained it. when the labels are all peeled off, the real you may not be what other people are ready to accept. but then again, too bad for them!
Pstr. Bong,I can only speculate abour your non-conformist act. Maybe you could tell me about it when we see each other.:-)
Olive, yes,he did explain it already.And i agree--it's just too bad if people doesn't accept the real us!
Hi Alan,I didn't imagine I'll make new friends through blogging. I don't have a label for you at all(maybe because I'm still wondering about who you are!).How's Davao?�
alan is a friend i met through friendster (though i've not have the privilege of meeting him in person). i think he may have found you through my link. nice guy, this alan :-)
the previous comment has a grammatical error, i think. oh no, and i've sent it to an editor too hehehe talk about labels, huh?
Hahaha! I'm not editing when I'm blogging. Yeah, I think my editor label stuck.
I thought you were "related" to Alan. I checked his profile then learned that he's from Davao.
Hi Alan,
I hope to visit sometime. I've been wanting to eat pomelo--from Davao and IN Davao. I'll be in Marbel this Holy Week for a mission trip, though. Near enough but not quite Davao.
Yes, you may add me to your link. I'll try to visit your blogsite whenever I can too.
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