In-between days

Right smack in the middle. Of in-between days. This is where I am now.

Do you have any of this kind of days? You’re not particularly happy. No cause for rejoicing. No surprises. You’re coasting along the shores of status quo. On the other hand, you’re also not particularly sad. You've kept your heart safe, and you've done your best to be undisturbed. You've succeeded because most of the time, you are. When you look up the sky, it’s a clear day. There might be no dark rain clouds foreboding a storm but it’s not summer-sunny either.

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My life seems lighter—literally—now that several inches of my hair have been chopped off. For some time now, I’ve been so used to having long hair that my locks have become my security blanket. But three days ago, I bravely walked inside a salon and let a hairdresser snip it. It’s shorter than I envisioned it to be. Blame it on my affinity with the printed page. While seated on the chair, I spent more time browsing through magazine pages than looking at what the hairdresser was doing. Next thing I know, when I looked up and stared at the mirror, I suddenly felt cold. The security blanket has become a towel. To the hairdresser’s defense, “a little vague” best describes my instructions. He did the best his skilled hands allowed him to do. And to his credit, although many were initially surprised to see me with shorter hair, most of them think it’s a good kind of a change.

It’s common knowledge, or maybe an unspoken fact, that some women do something to their hair to make a silent statement. Statements like “My self-esteem is sliding down and I need a make-over to help me recover,” or “I can’t control most of what’s happening in my life but at least I can control my hair.” Or, “How could that guy break my heart?” Several female friends have cut their hair because they were depressed. Or heartbroken. Or sad. I’ve had my share of these emotion-driven haircuts. And the statements I’ve tried to make with these hair alterations range from the pathetic to the plausible. My statement this time is nothing dramatic. Just this: “Let’s see if I could live without my long hair for the meantime (well, at least for the next two months until it grows technically long again).”

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During these in-between days, I’m using my time reading. Two posts ago, I told you about a book. Hurray! I’ve finished that book last weekend. Since I am in the C.S. Lewis mode, I’m reading his other books, non-fiction this time. I’m also considering doing the following to redeem the time: dab into some serious writing, go back to playing Badminton, rearrange my room.

I think I better start before the calm waters of my in-between days get stirred again.